He moved in with me. I think there is a possibility that I could have had more confidence than what I currently have; however, I’ll give you a glimpse into some of the horrible things that have been said and done to me that have slowly chipped away at any small foundation of self-esteem that I had. It was just little things that he did to assert his control over me. Change ), You are commenting using your Google account. Thank you so much. broken legs but I chase perfection; italian; obsessed with lots of stuff. I was 13. I almost started to belive it to. However, that wasn’t always the case. I was going to fall for him, hard. He described to me times when he was in jail, and he peed on a young boy’s clothes because the boy pissed him off. Maybe I have a fear of not being able to control things, so I figure if I can control other people, then maybe I’ll feel a bit more like I can control myself; and that fear is not an excuse for doing the wrong thing, but I think NF is identifying that a lot of the problems that he listed in the other verses, come because he’s let fear take a place in his home, or his mansion; and he wraps this whole thing up by saying, Now I'm in a position, it's either sit here and let 'em winOr put him back outside where he came from, but I never can'Cause in order to do that, I'd have to open the doorsIs that me or the fear talking?

He told me I wasn’t allowed to talk to, or hangout with any guys because he said, “no guy will ever be nice to you, just to be nice to you. Social distancing and a loss of in person meetings has been tough, but you're still reaching out, you're still working on sobriety. However, writing about it, getting it out in the open, helps me a lot.

Because the first time he cheated wouldn’t be the last. If you are not okay with this, please do not continue to read. I thought that I wasn’t the girl guys were supposed to love. Kyle took everything I thought I was, and everything I thought I knew about what my first real love would be like and he tossed it aside like it was month-old leftovers. Although, I can’t really ever know that he won’t do this again. “Broken legs, but I chase perfection.” – 2nd line in “Mansion” by NF.

That can’t be done. It’s a very hard relationship for me to write about because I see my own stupidity, and I know all of you will as well. and that kind of goes back to the repression, or the building up the safety around you, instead of dealing with things, or welling to trust others; so instead of coming in contact with those problems and asking for help from other people; he just built this creepy dark mansion on the hill, where he sits by himself, and suffers from this emotional distress.Near the end of verse three we hear, But it's not, I'm not the only thing that's livin' in hereFear came to my house years ago, I let him inMaybe that's the problem, 'cause I've been dealing with this ever sinceI thought that he would leave, but it's obvious, he never didHe must have picked a room and got comfortable and settled in.

I had not gone out on it to snoop because, at this time, I had a Blackberry, and I wasn’t on an app where it’s pretty obvious whose page it is. I shrunk down, and I made myself small because I had this overwhelming fear of being alone that took over and controlled everything I did. However, it was not the fact that I was hooking up, it was the fact that I was doing it thinking that it would make them want to be in a relationship with me. Even when life turns out different than what you’ve planned, it’s always better to try and fail than to wonder what could have been. No matter how much I told him I wasn’t, he would argue that I was. So, we had to wait until a month after we started dating to actually see each other.

He used his charm to convince me that they were just for him because he wanted to know that I trusted him with those kinds of pictures. I finally cut the cord and moved on.

I let him force me to give him my passwords. I was 13 years old when I met my ex-boyfriend, Kyle*. jjproject: I love watching jinyoung eat (via knightly-whispers) 15 / REBLOG.

So NF starts rapping, ... a university writing center director who teaches literature classes and loves helping others to understand the deeper meanings of their favorite songs.

For you motherfucker!!! And he jumped in without skipping a beat, laying down rules about what I could and couldn’t do, who I could and couldn’t hang with. I'm an addictions counselor and I happened upon this sub today. It’s one thing to be comfortable with each other and know each other’s passwords and get on each other’s phones. You can get lyrics writing advice, prompts, discounts on courses, and sometimes even 1-on-1 help.

But the “Honeymoon Phase” of Kyle would quickly turn into the self-destructive, terrorizing relationship that made me a paranoid, trust-less person who thought that everyone was out to get her or against her in some way.

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